Thessalonika Nights...VBS themes and Memories.

You have to laugh sometimes...

We are in the midst of summer and consequently, in the middle of VBS season.

For the uninitiated outside of the church, VBS stands for Vacation Bible School. (For those initiated, be patient and enjoy the trip down memory lane.)

It’s a kind of church camp for Christian kids that happens during summer vacation.

I have fond memories of VBS as a child. I first experienced this rite of passage at South Side United Methodist Church, in Huntington, WV. That church was built, at least in part, by some great, great uncles of mine. (Or so I learned a few years ago.)

It was the church where I was raised, taught the faith, embraced the faith and was baptized into the faith. It was the church where I took my first communion. It was one of the churches my father helped pastor when he was in seminary. It was even the church where Jan and I were married on a rainy day in 1990.

It is, sadly, now a parking lot.

But it was also the church where I learned to have a good laugh at the things we do in the church.

Like VBS.

My memories of VBS start at maybe five or six years old. VBS lasted from Sunday to Saturday in what was arguably the hottest, muggiest time of the year in the already muggy Ohio Valley.

We children were walked up into the education building where we were taught Bible stories, where we did crafts, colored, sang and where the sneaky ladies who ran the show made us bring a towel and forced us all to lie on it for 30 minutes each evening. Those broads had it dialed in, let me tell you.

But what really sticks in my memory is the vendetta the VBS volunteers apparently had against parents. Because each evening we would be taken to the fellowship hall in the basement (by the Baptistry which was painted, I seem to recall, with images of the Jordan River…a fair distance from the Ohio).

That was the hall where I would one day eat wedding cake with my bride (not, mind you, washed down with a nice Chardonnay, as we were teetotaler, old school United Methodists).

But there were mind altering substances in my childhood nonetheless. Because each evening, around 7 pm, we VBS kids were all fed sugar wafers. Remember them? Just, nothing but sugar. The name says it all, right?

We washed those down with copious amounts of Kool-Aid, thickened with enough sugar for a diabetic coma, the brew colored with assorted red, purple or orange chemical dyes.

We were then turned loose to run around the room, or sometimes outside in nearby grass, like little Christian dervishes, yelling, shoving, laughing, our brains hopped up on the closest thing a little kid could get to cocaine.

How we ever went to sleep later, I have no idea. I feel that the volunteers had a good laugh though.

Fast forward, and we have four children of our own. Jan and I volunteered at our fair share of VBS. She would teach and do crafts, I would sometimes drive the bus (once actually wrecking it into the bus shed…thus being freed of the responsibility to drive it and earning the nickname, ‘Crash.’)

I was also, by virtue of my career, the de-facto emergency response team, being called to any number of owies, boo-boos, bumps, sprains, scrapes and other assorted events which were much more in need of hugs (and cookies) than emergency care.

Our church then, College Street Baptist in Walhalla, SC was much larger than those Jan and I were raised in, and the church reached out to a lot more communities. Which was great! Some kids got wonderful Summer fun, snacks and just a chance to be loved. Or a chance to enjoy AC if their parents didn’t have it.

It was also a great break for said parents. We knew many kids who visited multiple VBS events throughout the summer, going from church to church, denomination to denomination, theme to theme. (Goodness knows how much weight they gained in snacks!) They met Jesus in the jungle, the arctic, under the ocean and in the wild-wild west, all in one season. Jesus is versatile, right?

And sometimes mommy just needs a break.

Anyway, it was all great, exciting and exhausting fun that left even our own children utterly defeated by bed-time; with us not far behind.

Now, when we were children ourselves, VBS was put together by the local church for the most part.

These days it is much, much more. It’s an industry. Various companies put together themed packages with decorations, swag, lesson plans and all the rest. Living as we do in the south, I always look forward to seeing the new year’s advertisements.

Let me give you a sample:

“Trusting Jesus in a Wild World.” And also evading bear attacks…

I would have liked this. Archeology themed; nice. I “dig” it.

“Fusing elements for Explosive Joy.” Also a nice touch. Alas, probably no real explosions; just baking soda and vinegar. Now, turning water into wine? That would be cool!

It’s an easy online search to find a vast array of VBS themes that churches can purchase and offer to the kiddos. Frankly, I laugh but I do appreciate the passion people put forth to give children exposure to the Christian message and to reach into their lives with what, for some, may be the closest thing to a vacation they’ll get.

Or the closest thing to a chemistry lab or archeology dig.

But I do have a few ideas of my own. I mean, what about:

Cooking with the Lord!

Jesus was always feeding folks, so this summer we’ll just have some bread, figs, fish and grape-juice (non-alcoholic) in memory of the kinds of food Jesus and his disciples would have enjoyed. We’ll also explore the gospel as we create recipes from the first century!

(Actually this is one of the things I’ve always loved about Jesus. He fed people and enjoyed a good meal.)

Putting on the whole armor of God! And making some ourselves!

Want to get the boys back in the church? We all do! In this latest VBS offering, we’ll fire up the forges, hammer out some armor and blades, and learn what Paul was referring to when the talked about the sword of the spirit, the helmet of salvation, the shield of faith and all the rest. (EMS will be on site for all events). Parents urged to have the kids bring their Bibles, a tourniquet and blood type.)

Thessalonika Nights!

“If you ain’t saved, you’re lost!”

Who doesn’t love a good NASCAR race? In this year’s race themed VBS, we’ll use bicycles, wagons and anything with wheels to run races around the church, just like we’re called to run the race of faith. By the end of the week, the kids will understand Paul’s letters and also know how to refuel and change tires in record time.

How Many Followers Would Jesus Have?

In this cutting edge take on the men and women of the Bible, children will create social media campaigns for the greats, like Abraham, Moses, David, Elijah and the disciples. Using Tik-tok, Facebook (so the adults can feel useful), X, Bluesky, LinkedIn and others, the kids will interface with Christian programmers and web-experts to see how those stories could look different in a modern age. How many page-views would Paul get? How many likes would King David receive? By the end of the week, a multi-media presentation will be given to the church. Devices will not be provided since most of the kids have one anyway.

One of my great heroes of the faith is G.K. Chesterton, Catholic novelist and apologist. He said:

“It is the test of a good religion whether you can joke about it.”

VBS made me laugh, smile sweat and sleep like the dead over the years.

But for all that I’m making fun, I think it’s a wonderful thing.

And I hope all of the kids get to enjoy one another, experience the love of the volunteers and ultimately the love of God when they attend.

Hopefully with a little less red dye these days.

Edwin

PS: Here’s a link to something I wrote about VBS many years ago, concerning the way that the children there remind me that God loves us as children too.

https://edwinleap.com/children-of-the-father/